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My Christmas Wish for you all

Journal by janilye

Yes, I found my great grandfather, four years ago now.
He went missing after his wife died in 1898 leaving behind his 4 year son.
That 4 year old son, was my grandfather. On grandfather's marriage certificate, in 1922, was written 'father deceased'. Who knew better?

As a person who deals in facts and the printed document, I didn't believe it; and since 1966 when grandfather died I began the hunt.

I discovered Alfred McAlpin Eather, born at 'Henriendi' on the Namoi river near Narrabri, New South Wales, on the 30 June 1863, he died on the 15 May 1953 at Toowoomba, Queensland and he is buried at Toowoomba under the name of Alfred McEather. Since 1898 he'd been a drover in Southern Queensland.

I'm struggling to understand why! Why didn't he come forward, why didn't he call his son? Was he on the dock watching when his son sailed off to war? did he celebrate when his son returned.
Didn't he want to know his son's wife and children? Or me, I was 10 years old when he died. Didn't he want to know me?

This Christmas, my wish for you all is that you try to remove the fences, mend the roads, just a note or a phone call. For your sake and your family.
No regrets.

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by janilye Profile | Research | Contact | Subscribe | Block this user
on 2019-12-14 23:37:33

janilye - 7th generation, Convict stock. Born in New South Wales now living in Victoria, carrying, with pride 'The Birthstain'.

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Comments

by ngairedith on 2019-12-15 03:28:26

Hear, Hear janilye,
One of my sisters made enemies out of, and alienated herself from, her siblings. Except me. She always cheerfully answered my calls, but she always knew best what she was doing, wouldn't heed (bossy sister) advice and it was hard work talking to her.
So, my calls became less frequent.
Couple of days before Xmas, year before last, she was in hospital (unbeknown to us). She said to the staff (because she knew best) "I'm getting out of here because I have to buy the xmas ham yet" and instantly dropped dead .. she was 54.

We've got to get over ourselves .. just a note or a phone call ..

by janilye on 2019-12-15 08:23:47

Indeed ng, I'm so sorry.
Nobody should get 'what if' and 'regret' in the stocking every Christmas.

by Scott_J on 2019-12-15 12:02:32

Get out of my head janilye.

I'm going through stuff for the past three years now, and in many ways I'm probably seen as your ggrandfather is, with people asking questions about why?

I haven't disappeared, but decisions I've made have moved me away from my family. Some people are supportive, some aren't, and walls have gone up.

While I've made attempts, the walls are still up. It's completly on me to fix it, which I don't think is fair, but that's all part of it I guess.

And time only moves on. Thanks for making me think.

by janilye on 2019-12-15 16:54:06

You must live your life as you see fit, or there too you'll have regrets.
But this Christmas, just consider being once again gathered under the family tree.

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